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 “You probably don’t remember me”

by: Mona Therese Winston

There is a light that shines beyond all things on earth, beyond us all, beyond the heavens, beyond the highest, the very highest heavens. This is the Light that shines in our heart. ~Chandogya Upanishad

You probably don’t remember me, but a year ago or so you asked me what yoga meant in my life. I answered you back that I was not the right person since my native language is not english. You responded to me, that you would not let anything hold you back, and following you on FB I can see that is true. I write to you now as an act of gratitude for inspiring me to write in English, not that you should print it, I just like to share with you a little piece of what you planted in me and now is growing into what could end up as a novel. With gratitude and Thank you! Here is the beginning of my journey there took me on the path of yoga.

I sit and look back in time with a smile, looking back on some of the headlines in my life and the transformations I have gone through. Today I am living a spiritual life; some would say religious, with my four to five hours of practice every day of Pranayama, Meditation, Yoga, Mantra, Prayers… I wonder sometimes if I would have had all these blessings if I had not met “the teacher” called Cancer.

When I was 18 years old I got introduced to Maharishi mahesh yogi. It took some years before I got initiated into TM.

My boyfriend at that time practiced Transcendental meditation, a practice so far away from my own life style. I was brought up with no religious or spiritual believes, no prayers and no Sunday walks to the church. My Father told me religion had not produced much, but war and stealing people’s money. He told me to follow my heart and listen to the voice inside for it is the only one knowing what is right for me (I would say that is spiritual).

When I was 20 years, I said to my yoga teacher I would like to teach yoga, he told me, “That is all fine, but do your practice six times a week for seven years and read the sacred texts, when you have done that, you know if you really like to teach yoga and then tell me again.” I continued my practice intensely for two months and then it slowed down to two times a week, my ballet training took most of my time then.

One day my ballet teacher said to me “are you feeling sick” I was pale and I was loosing a lot of weight. He told me to go see a doctor and so I did, for the next tree years I went in an out of the doctors and hospitals doors, no one could figure out what was the matter with me, until the day I passed out on the bath-room floor late at night. When I came to my self again I called for an ambulance and I was taken to the emergency. I had cancer, I was 25 years old and by now I had lost all my faith in doctors. The next morning my uterus and one ovary left my body, they where to sick to stay with me. The Cancer taught me to pray and have faith in the divine and I refused the chemotherapy. The doctors said, “You might not survive without it” I replied ”I hardly survived listing to you before my operation”. I agreed to have radiation, to tired to ague my Mother, I had 3 times of radiation, I was supposed to have 2×25 treatments, but it made me so sick that I decided to take my life in my own hands.

Just so there will not be a misunderstanding, I have today all respect for the Doctors of the West as of the East and I am grateful for both sides and know there is a lot to be learned and benefit from on both sides.

A friend came to the hospital to visit me and gave me the book of Louise Hay, “You Can Heal Your Life” and I learned the power of affirmations. Slowly I educated my self and Holistic/Organic treatments brought me back to perfect health. Only two months after my operation, I was up and going more energized than ever. From this day yoga became my lifetime partner.

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